Saturday, May 10, 2008

she

"When did she buy those flower-pots?"
The sunlight was streaming in happily through the curtains, accompanying the cool morning breeze on its dance through the small rooms.I was sitting cross-legged on the bed with the Sunday newspaper spread out before me: battling the Sudoku monster.
The numbers were swirling around in my head, clearing and clouding up again together, when they were shot away abruptly by the question.
I looked up with a frown.He had a slight smile on his face.A funny smile it was…a nostalgic quality to it.Like when you are thinking of someone very very far away.For a moment I was confused. 'She'? But only for a moment.He was referring to her of course, my mother.And he really wasn’t asking me.Just one of those questions that abruptly jumps out in the silence.
"Which flower pots?"
"You know…the ones with the plant all flowing over the edges…"
Then it hit me.The scene.Very badly.I had forgotten it.I looked down in a flash.
"When we were here", I replied.
I pretended to continue solving the puzzle.But in fact that question had reminded me of a hot summer morning, a long time back.
She had dragged me to the nursery to buy plants.We had just moved to our new home and she had the typical womanly instinct to fill the empty space around with plants.Such a boring expedition for someone my age.I must have been 7 or 8.I guess she didnt want to go alone.Even a kid who could offer no help in choosing plants was better than no company at all.The nursery you see was far from home.I wanted to go with my brother, he was off to play cricket.I was in that brother worship phase-used to tag along with him everywhere.But instead I was to go with her, to buy plants! Even the fact that she said "flowering plants dear" didn’t help.
The walk was unpleasant, on a hot dusty road and under the cruel glare of the sun.My open sandals got to work- gathering up as much soil as they could.I tried hanging on her hand, on the end of her pallu even, so I wouldnt have to walk.But she shook me off and one dangerous look was enough to make me behave civilised at least for a while.
It was the longest walk. (Just a 5 min walk really…It's funny how everything seems big when you are small).
We reached the nursery and the first thing I saw was an old abandoned shed.I ran towards it, full of the most interesting tools, like hoes and spades!Rusted and dirty.
And eerie creatures hiding in the shadows…that were waiting to eat me up…
I was lost in the world of the Shed soon enough.I heard her shout from somewhere not to wander too far away.I played around the cool shed for a long time as she argued with the maali over the prices.She finally called me, saying we were going .I looked with regret at the Shed.
"Are we coming back again?" I asked.
"Yes.I just saw the plants today.We'll buy tomorrow.Lets go."
I cannot remember whether we went back again.We must have...I remember the plants, in all shapes and sizes, around our house. (The same plants died silently of neglect when she fell sick.)It's true I think, now.The words I read once-"People do not die.They are only forgotten and pass into oblivion".
We sat silent for some time…both of us.Thinking of her.